Thursday, May 26, 2011

I Believe in Magic

There are few times in your life when you meet someone and from the touch of their skin you can feel their lips against yours, know how their neck smells and honestly melt underneath their gaze. Last night Anthony and I went on a walk... an epic walk. Haha. It was a beautiful May night and the start of our five month anniversary. He held my hand and walked along side me like any good boyfriend would but there was something different about last night. Be it the sweet air or the constant spiderwebs we threw each other into it just felt kinda like a fairytale. Not the type that would be read to your children at night or become a Disney movie some day but the kind of fairy tale where I can close my eyes 100 years from now and still remember what he looked like under the street lights on that summer day. I had a blast just walking with no real destination with my man on my side. Sometimes we would sit and have deep meaningful conversation, debate about our different views on the world and honestly he was totally flirting with me the whole night, haha. After five months I shouldn't think of flirting as shocking but the way our relationship started... it seriously is.
I actually don't think there was much flirting. It was me seeing what I wanted and him trying not to be a bad bro and go out with his friend's girl (ex girl). Like I said before (and like many Scorpios apparently) I'm totally interested if I'm interested but the second I lose interest you're gonna have to do something drastic which is what happened with Anthony. My Anthony... the guy who puts everyone else's happiness before his own...
There was one night we were laying together, the room was dark and only lit by candle light; I was upset at him because he didn't want to use the term "girlfriend" because he feared my ex would hear (my ex who didn't care) about it and finally tears rolling down my face I looked him in the eyes and said, "Can't you see?... That I think you're perfect. Not in the way a 16 year old love struck girl sees her high school boyfriend but in the way that I can see you for exactly who you are and I accept you for all of it and I want you for all of it... because you're perfect to me...just the way you are." He'll deny it but he held back tears cleared his throat and said softly and innocently in that smooth deep voice I adore, "You've been my girl friend since I kissed you Christmas night."......
So I guess last night was magical night number 3... Together we walked the streets laughing and having an amazing time looking at our shadows ("my hips sway a lot" "yeah but it's not a waddle" "who said it was a waddle?!" "nobody! I'm saying it's not a waddle" "By rejecting the fact that it is a waddle you must have thought about it BEING a waddle!" "'s a cute waddle..." "I DON'T WADDLE!") ;at one point he would only speak to me in song titles and/or movie quotes, haha. Last night I learned things about him I didn't know and vice-versa. He does this cute thing when he's tired... he puts his arm around me and digs his head into my neck and I know it's his bedtime cue. He's a year younger than me but in many ways I feel like he's teaching me with his cool tempered wisdom how to accept and relax and not blow up where as I show him that passion is an amazing thing and being emotional is scary but rewarding because you become that much closer to one another. We have no age as minimal as the difference is. We just are.

So... I believe in magic and therefore I believe in love. I don't believe people are "meant to be" because that's just bullshit abusive boyfriends say so they can fuck you over and you'll take them back time and time again...huh! haha but I do believe that sometimes people... just work. And so I guess the conclusion of this is that I used to be afraid of him talking to my ex but after last night and how much I feel like we "just work" I trust him. Don't trust my ex (actually every time he's mention I wish he was a Jew taking a shower in the early 1940s ((not anti-Semitic just being vividly historical)) ) but I do trust him... mostly. And for now Mostly is all I have for my beautiful blue eyed boy with the ruby pouty lips... So gorgeous :^)

Happy Anniversary, Love.

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